I was chatting to a friend on Facebook last night, and he threw me this quote as an idea for an article. This got me thinking about those things which we consider essential, and that there was in fact a time when we managed to live perfectly well without them.
To start with, we never would have even been having that conversation if sites like Facebook didn't exist, and as I sit here, typing at my mac, I start to think of the olden days, when writers sat under trees with notebooks (the ones made from actual paper) and pencils. What did they even write about? How did they research anything?! The mind boggles. Today a friend admitted he went cold turkey when his last iPhone broke, and lasted an inglorious total of two weeks. The benefits of modern technology and social media are fairly well-documented, but are we becoming too reliant?
The things you didn't realise you couldn't live without
Plenty of us have developed a way of living that makes us truly believe that we couldn't function without Facebook, Twitter and Google, but what would happen if, overnight, these companies decided to start charging for their services?Would you quit, or would you pay?
I think that I'd quit on principle, but in reality, that might not be as easy as it sounds. You'd instantly lose your friends, followers, and your main information source - it'd be the media equivalent of getting expelled from school, becoming a social outcast, and getting ditched by your boyfriend, all in one day.
Support groups would probably spring up everywhere, packed with addicts.
There's no DSM criteria for being a social media addict, but maybe there seriously needs to be. Have you ever counted how many times a day you check facebook? Do you tweet more than 50 times a day? Are you still stalking your ex from 2009 on a daily basis? Perhaps we need a social media Rehab ( though god knows what the hell people would do there).
"Extraordinary thing, the internet. Possibility of genuine global communication, the first great democratic medium.... Two guys wanking in cyberspace." 18 years ago, Anna from Closer by Patric Marber notes a disappointing reality of technological advancement. Unfortunately, for every news-sharing networking professional, there's going to be at least twice as many securing overseas wives, checking into 'bed', or blasting racist comments out of their asses. Perhaps some of these indispensable applications are proving more trouble than they're worth.
Virtual trouble is indeed leaking into the real world. Wikipedia claims that 'In the UK, between 20 to 33 percents of divorce petitions cite Facebook as a cause'. The same page also cites 'envy' and 'stress' as negative psychological impacts that affect users. This might sounds ridiculous, but ask yourself; have you ever been slightly offended that someone removed you from their friends list, or felt inadequate when reading a friends status update about their fabulous life?An application called 'Take This Lollipop' that recently went viral is another indication of our fascination over privacy and boundaries. Despite being warned by public service messages about privacy such as this, I still see many of my Facebook friends listing their addresses (even the floor and apartment number), and their current location. Sandra checked in at the Gas Station at 2am. Do you really want 687 people to know you're in a deserted place, alone, in the middle of the night?!
It's partly a question of moderation on our part. Facebook stalkers are only able to access information that we have put there in the first place. This isn't something that people would necessarily be concerned about, not before you find yourself the victim of a malevolent cyber-being who stalks you through dozens of fake profiles, sends slanderous messages to your co-workers, your boss, and your family, harasses and verbally abuses you on a daily basis, and turns up at your boyfriends apartment on your birthday, for example.
Kicking the Habit
We've always been aware that drug addicts will do almost anything to feed their habit, and as social media moves from the realms of 'want' into the dungeon of 'need', we could be walking into a not-so-cleverly-concealed trap.But how do you know if you're in too deep?
Have you ever declined a social invitation (like, going for a drink with friends) in favour of sitting in front of facebook for the evening?
It's a given that you occasionally stalk your ex, but do you have a fake profile for the purpose, and have you ever sent anonymous messages to him?
Have you ever updated your status with something like "is going to bed" or "is watching the dog sleep"?
Is you answered yes to the above, you may need professional help. If you answered 'yes' to number three, please delete yourself immediately and permanently from Facebook, everybody hates you.
With the future of the internet as unstable as it is, maybe it's wise to prepare for the possibility of a social media apocalypse. In the spirit of half-hearted New Year's resolutions, here are three offerings I am prepared to give up to the internet gods (who I believe to be working at The Huffington Post (#shamelessflattery):
1. Twitter. As much as I enjoy the twitterings of Charlie Brooker and Steven Fry, the majority of tweeters are twits, and I recognise that it is basically the internet equivalent of the lidless eye of Sauron.
2. LinkedIn. I'm convinced that no one in the entire world uses this site, despite the emails I keep getting informing me that so-and-so has invited me to join. It must be some sort of evil conspiracy.
(Did I really agree to cull three internet habits?)
3. Facebook. Yes, really. It's basically a glorified email-platform these days, and I could surely just use email for that, right? The only reason I'm not going to delete myself is because I can't be bothered copying all my photos and contact details down, it'd take forever. The only reason.
No comments:
Post a Comment